The thought of waiting feels lonely. It feels like something better is around the corner, a disruptive thought that messes with my contemptness. Doing noting, sitting, being still. Can I be still? I worry, I control, I do and I do and I do…I don’t wait. One of those big challenges I face, just to be who I am, who I am created to be, not the girl next door, not the image that flashes on screens that now surround my life.
But it’s a good plan, to wait, to see, just to be and rest in all that has been done for me. To trust that it will be ok. If I let go of the reigns my life won’t fall apart. It fell apart once or twice, I didn’t like that. You wouldn’t like that. But I will try to wait, just to be me. To sit where Grace sits, together and wait until I can see how Grace sits, how grace waits.