Monthly Archives: February 2014
I still remember the feel of your kiss. Your lips, your prickles, your nose in the way. I remember the warmth of my lips in the crook of your neck. ..I miss the warmth of my lips in the crook of your neck. I see it and I can almost breathe you in still. I remember it now, but will I always? I don’t know.
Don’t slip away from me, stay.
I know what I ask is impossible; I just want it to be possible. I know I need to feel love again. I am so sore from the aching, so full of callouses from the scar tissue that used to be my heart. This should only be a post-operative complication, but I fear, oh I fear, its more and without treatment it could be fatal. I only know one course of treatment for that my Paul, you knew it too. Complete cardiac intervention by the Best of the best. By the Creator Himself. He knows its workings intimately. The treatment is love. I cannot see any other way.
To love with a wounded heart, push the boundaries, and rehabilitate the possibilities for life.
Love in my life.
I am glad to have love in my life. So glad that I had you to love and share with.
Lots of people fall in love and then just kind of coexist. We really shared love. To be fair we didn’t create it; it was created for us and given to us. God did that, He authored love. We knew His love, shared that and it grew to be our love. Our threefold cord. I am so very very grateful.
So what now that you aren’t beside me anymore? Always a part of me, always in my heart of course, but in so many ways you are gone. For this moment, I lay aside the sadness to glimpse beyond and see, I need to see. I choose to see.
The love in my life is changing again, shifting out of a physical realm and settling back in the folds of His grace. It’s a sweet place that offers comfort, warmth and protection. I need those things. My threefold cord has had a strand ripped away, not as strong as it once was, but stronger than it was yesterday.
My cup isn’t overflowing yet, but it will again one day. I still have love. Love I can share, love that can grow, love that is capable of more than I could ever hope or imagine.
Love in my life.